Monday, March 26, 2012

Random Thoughts of a Monday Morning

The sun is streaming through my office window. (Yes, really. Yes, same office, in Portland. No, I'm not dreaming. I know because I'm pumping. Yes, with the sun streaming in the window. It's reflective glass.)

There's enough breastmilk in the fridge at home for Jackie for the whole day, so I can just sit here and work (and blog) and pump and concentrate and not run home in the middle of the day or get all over-planny about when to pump versus when Jackie is going to be hungry that is closest to a reasonable lunch time.

I got three ounces this morning - new trick is get up, as soon as possible pump 15 minutes, then stop, fix breakfast, do something else (yoga? Prep a chicken for roasting? Trader Joe's has local all-natural chickens for cheap - works out to like $7 per chicken. That's dinner. Yum.) then pump again for 15-20 minutes. Usually works out that I get significantly more on the second round, but if not it's also usually pretty obvious that it's not going to happen and I can move on to the shower.

We had chocolate croissants for breakfast (also courtesy of Trader Joe), which were yummy.

Matt took the kiddos to the dentist (presumably they won't demand much of Jackie since she's 6 months old). Robert is convinced that our dentist is going to break a window with a stick and has been saying so for months. I'm excited to hear if he asked Dr. P. about it - should be entertaining.

We're buying a house - we move in 23 days. Not that anyone is counting.

I have a beautiful, happy family and awesome, wonderful friends.

I have a lot to be grateful for today. I will try to be present in today, rather than worrying about tomorrow. (Ooo - sun went behind a cloud JUST as I typed that! Spooky!!!)

(Okay now it's back.)

Much love,
Suzi

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Plugging along...

As in this freaking duct is plugged AGAIN. It's like a weekly thing. Same spot. Same visible plug on nipple. Same stream of profanities issuing from Mama Suzi. Same routine trying to find someone who does therapeutic ultrasound for plugged ducts. (Trip to Canada, Ms. Jackie?) So I'll keep at it, me and the hot pads and the advil and the phone. Will report back as events warrant.

Still doing the dance of the dwindling freezer stash. My lactation consultant had great suggestions, the biggest one of which is, pump more. Pump here, pump there, pump everywhere. Pump for five and pump for ten. Take a break and pump again. It's tiresome, dear readers. But I think it's working. The trick is, just because one gets no more at first, doesn't mean it isn't helping. The ladies ramp it up in response to demand, but it can take a few days, as anyone who has spent hours trapped under a squirmy little growth spurting nursling can attest. So five minutes before running out the door is worthwhile even if it yields just a teaspoon. And I have noticed that when I have several lots of puming days in a row, I do start to get more yield with each session.

The problem is, every time I make progress, something mucks it up. Plugged ducts reduce output (temporarily). Plus we've all been sick - we picked up a nasty cold and an intestinal bug while visiting a preschool a couple weeks ago. Seemed like a great preschool so we're choosing to chalk it up to "all preschools are petri dishes," rather than that this one is particularly germy. But we should look at a couple more, probably. And I digress. Again. Really, me. No, it happens, don't be so surprised.

So while it's sort of tiresome to pump so freaking much, I've turned it into a sort of game. How many times can I pump at work? (Four.) (Really.) Can I sneak in a pump while Matt is changing Jackie's diaper and singing the Jackie Bean song (a Matt Dada Composition)? Can I pump one breast while Jackie nurses the other? How about pumping ten minutes, then showering, then pumping again, do I get more that way than pumping for the same amount of time in one sitting?

Meanwhile I've begun to investigate breastmilk sharing. Yep. I have a dear and wonderful friend who has offered to pump some for me after she has filled up her own freezer. I'm also looking at Eats on Feets (like meals on wheels - get it?) and trying to decide if I can get comfortable accepting breastmilk from a stranger. It's funny, I would totally donate if I were the one with the surplus, but when the shoe is on the other foot, it ain't so comfy.

And while all this is going on, Jackie is thriving and gaining weight and filling up diapers and otherwise acting like a baby who is getting plenty to eat. It was like this with Robert, and somehow we made it work. So I'm trying to live in the day rather than in the worrisome maybe future, trust that I will make it all work somehow, and just enjoy this sweet, wonderful time with my beautiful, happy baby girl.

I hope you are all so blessed as well!

Much love,
Suzi